Sunday, October 20, 2013 ; 8:29 PM {♥}
07-Sep-2013
Life, it's really unfair isn't it?
You work your ass out for good results where else others simply just have to sit in lessons and get As on their report cards.
You work your ass out (again) for high paying job positions where else others are born with a silver spoon in their mouth.
You end up retiring and have to babysit your grandchildren where else others have maids to mind all house chores for them.
You might be thinking, "Hey why is life so unfair to me? Why do others always get better stuff?"
That is because we, as human beings, like to compare.
If you realize, we have been comparing to each other like forever.
When we are born, we get compared to our sizes and stamina, where our parents will be thinking "Hey, this is so unfair. Why my child gets so sickly every time but other people's children are so strong and healthy?"
Then, we grow up a bit more and we start comparing examination results.
Then, we grow up a teeny more and we start comparing our heights and weights.
Then, we grow up a little more and we start comparing salary status.
Then, we grow up even more and start comparing our children.
And this vicious cycle just repeats itself over and over again.
Do you feel great after comparing yourself to others that are better than you?
Obviously not.
But as human beings we just can't seem to stop comparing ourselves to others.
Maybe some of you might argue notably that comparing is a positive thing -- you can improve yourself and strive to become better than others.
However, is it really that great to compare others with yourself?
Why let your life be so miserable when you can make it happier?
So the question is, how do we stop comparing since it's a human nature for us to compare?
I actually went to ask some religion seniors for the answer just for this blogpost.
What they were saying was to feel our own heart and mind, and never be too bothered by your surroundings.
One of them even said "to pretend that all of those better people have died" ahahaha!
But what I feel is that you make yourself feel that you are the king of the world, you just do your best at everything, and if you really felt that you've done your best but still couldn't get the results you wanted, it's okay. Just give yourself a pat on the shoulders, go and do whatever you like for a day and continue to work hard the very next day. Don't go around comparing results and demoralize yourself, that's equivalent to suicide.
I mean, you have done your best, what is there to complain or be sad about?
Unless you don't give a damn in working hard and then get lousy results, then just slap yourself lol.
Now just allow me to sidetrack.
Why did I want to do such a chimology post?
Actually this post was supposed to be a rant post ranting at this b*tch whom I subconsciously compared myself to her.
I felt really inferior, thinking why does MY extended family likes her more than their own flesh and blood?
I felt left out whenever she's around, it was like she was the one in the middle of the spotlight, and I felt that should be my spotlight.
Also, why does the adult thought of her FIRST whenever they've got an outing and only cared to bring her out instead of me? I mean, the adults could say because she has pretty busy parents that neglects her. FUCK YOU then, I'm always alone at home the whole time. I see only four walls when I come back from school. She still has her maids and siblings and her extravagant gadgets (She has a rich family, you see I'm comparing again.)
Why does the adults in my extended family always tells me to give way to xiaomeimei (younger sister) when she is only 2 years younger than me? Furthermore, I always had to be the big sister and give way to the younger cousins. So it was like, 7 year old me is also the big sister who had to take care of everybody, 17 year old me still is the big sister. While for others 7 year old them is little kid, 17 year old them still is a little kid just because all of them are younger than me.
So all these "Why does" made me compared myself to her and became pretty jealous, comparing the attention we received and family status and the adults' biasness.
In the end, I became the fool.
Not only my self esteem became super low especially with that girl around (oh this b*tch glared at me wtf)
Also I became a topic to gossip among the adults, and was labeled as the "Pathetic and Weird" Ong.
So why compare? Probably if I did not compare and just minded my own business, I wouldn't have to write my own tragedy on a blog where nobody reads.
"Don’t compare yourself with others. Be true to who you are and try to cherish and feel content with your own irreplaceable life. Even if you’re sometimes laughed at, or people let you down, keep going forward and never let yourself be defeated." -Daisaku Ikeda (To My Young Friends)
Let me end off this blogpost with this quote by Sensei which I accidentally found online and thought it was relevant with the topic that we are talking today. This blogpost took me almost TWO MONTHS to finish up because it's 21st October today, and I started this blogpost on 7th September.
I will like to do more of such chimology posts because I feel that not only I might help any lost souls on the internet (just like me), also it feels like the more sensible and matured inner me is talking and guiding the torn and tattered outer me.
Thanks for reading!
Signing off, Wenxse.
iloooooooveyous {♥}
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